One and One Make Two

VancouverMom.ca launched!

2009-10-19T17:04:00.002-04:00

Hi everyone,

Just wanted to let you know that I've just launched VancouverMom.ca and this blog is no longer active. Be sure to check us out!

Thanks,
Christine

Ravelry

2008-06-12T10:12:00.003-04:00

Having kids has re-awakened my love of knitting. I learned how to knit when I was about seven years old and burned myself out after knitting a sleeveless, shapeless sweater for myself. I had cast-off so tightly that I could barely get my little arms through the armholes.

When I was about 18, I picked up the knitting spirit again when I met Jesse and thought I should create the obligatory boyfriend sweater. I knit the thing way too loose and long, so it really should fit a guy who is about a foot taller and about 100 pounds heavier. Bless him, he still has it tucked away in the back corner of his closet (albeit with some shaming after he asked me if he should donate it to Goodwill).

Then in my early twenties, I decided that I would knit "more seriously". Using the same pattern for Jesse's sweater, I made a new and improved sweater for my sister. By then, I found out how to control the tension on the yarn. I also made my mom a cabled cardigan for her birthday.

And then my knitting laid dormant until I was pregnant with Audrey. By the time she was born, I had knit her a baby blanket and two sweaters. I went on to knit her another hooded sweater.

At six months old, Grace has one sweater and I'm working on another for when she turns one.

In this new era of knitting, I've come across this great knitting site: www.ravelry.com. It's still in beta, but it takes only a few days to get your invite to join. Awesome site. I'm obsessed in finding other examples of projects that use the yarn that I'm using.

gDiapers

2008-06-11T12:35:00.003-04:00

My sister sent me this link to a really cool product for those of you who are wondering if they should go with cloth or disposable diapers:

http://www.gdiapers.com/

The diaper consists of a reusable outer pant, and an internal flushable liner. Pretty cool!

Here in Toronto we are fortunate to have the green bin recycling program, which allows us to "recycle" our disposable diapers. The program turns organic materials (including diapers and kitty litter!) into high-quality commercial grade compost that can be sold to farmlands. It's pretty amazing. I'm not sure why ALL cities haven't jumped on board this program, but really it's something to have your city look into.

I found this article that provides some good links about the cloth vs. disposable debate. Really, why aren't the diaper companies more accountable? In our world where going green is getting super trendy, they really need to get with the program. Five-hundred years to biodegrade a diaper is not just unacceptable - it's irresponsible.

Follow the links in that article and contact Pampers and Huggies if you want to let them know how you think. Better yet, just click on these links, below:

Pampers:

http://pgcanadaen.custhelp.com/cgi-bin/pgcanadaen.cfg/php/enduser/ask.php

Huggies:

http://www.huggieshappybaby.com/utility/contactus.aspx

The Business of Being Born

2008-02-06T14:05:00.000-05:00

People are often dumbfounded when I tell them I had Grace at home. They ask me, "You mean, on purpose? Or was it by accident?" The straight-up answer is, YES, I meant to have her at home. I'll probably blog about my reasons why sometime.

For now, I wanted to share an invitation sent to me by my midwife.

The Association of Ryerson Midwifery Students (ARMS) invites you to an exclusive screening of the Business of Being Born: A new documentary produced by Ricki Lake.

Monday February 11 2008
TIme: 730pm
Place: Lib 72, 350 Victoria St. Ryerson University

Birth: it's a miracle. A rite of passage. A natural part of life. But more than anything, birth is a business. Compelled to find answers after a disappointing birth experience with her first child, actress Ricki Lake recruits filmmaker Abby Epstein to examine and question the way American women have babies.

The film interlaces intimate birth stories with surprising historical, political and scientific insights and shocking statistics about the current maternity care system. When director Epstein discovers she is pregnant during the making of the film, the journey becomes even more personal.

Should most births be viewed as a natural life process, or should every delivery be treated as a potentially catastrophic medical emergency?"

$2 for students and $4 general admission

For more information on the movie:
http://www.thebusinessofbeingborn.com/

First and Best '07

2008-01-12T08:25:00.000-05:00

The Toronto Public Library has put together their First and Best Kids Books of 2007. You can find it here:
http://kidsspace.torontopubliclibrary.ca/genCategory17398.html

Nymbler

2008-01-12T08:22:00.001-05:00

While researching baby names, I came across this fantastic baby naming tool called Nymbler. The interesting thing about this tool is that it's based upon an application called The Hunch Engine, so it makes personalized suggestions based upon your likes and dislikes. Neat!

Birth Story

2008-01-11T22:38:00.000-05:00

I've been telling people that I had Grace at home and recounting my birth story. I've had two moms-to-be tell me - thank me actually - for telling them about my positive experience. And it occurred to me: people rarely hear about positive birth experiences. It's always about the episiotomies, the forceps, the c-sections, the hours of pushing, the "failure to progress", and of course, THE PAIN.

The truth is: I don't think I could have had a more positive birth experience. Grace's birth was so oddly textbook, that it wasn't textbook. My water broke just after dinner at 7:15. I started my contractions at about 8:15 - just in time for Jesse to put Audrey to bed. I laboured for a couple of hours before calling Chris, my midwife, at 11:00 when my contractions were about two to five minutes apart. She came over at 11:45. I went from 4cm to 7cm in an hour and a half ("good" progress is usually one cm an hour). And then sometime around 2:45am, I got that urge to push. Chris asked me to hold off partly because she had to call her backup.

I think that lasted all of 30 minutes, because by 3:30, I definitely couldn't "hold off" any longer. By 3:50 I was definitely in stage two labour. Tia, my backup midwife, barely made it in time to see the shoulders birthed.

Grace was born by 4:11am.

All without pain medication, at home and with my previous delivery being a c-section (yes, the dreaded "VBAC").

Vimeo

2008-01-10T12:29:00.000-05:00

I've found a new addiction in Vimeo. I've finally found a way to share video with the fam in Vancouver without all the challenges of YouTube, which I found to be very user unfriendly for some of the novices I wanted to share videos with.

What I like best is that I can easily share video and hide the contents by password-protecting them. People don't have to become members to view hidden videos; they can just view them if they have the appropriate authentication rights. They've used AJAX pretty well: I can update details of the video while the video uploads. And I find the interface very clean and easy to use - both for administrators and people who simply want to view videos.

I wish that there were a faster way to upload the videos themselves - maybe via FTP or some desktop widget that would batch upload the videos. Right now, it's a bit of a pain to do them one at a time.

Check out the fruits of my labour here:
http://www.vimeo.com/christinekids

Beginning of a Love Affair

2007-12-03T11:20:00.000-05:00

This morning, Jesse went to work after a two-week hiatus to help care for the arrival of our new daughter Grace. I realized yesterday that I have no recollection of when Jesse left me with Audrey to join the "real world", except for one horrific day of her crying non-stop and me calling him to close our store for an hour and come home.

I was a little anxious about it yesterday. I mean, WHERE did these past two weeks go anyway?? I remember the two weeks prior to Grace's arrival: they just dragged and it seemed like I'd be pregnant forever.

But this morning as I stared down at Grace's little face and pursed lips, I realized that it's all going to be ok. In fact, I realized that it would be the beginning of a wonderful life-long love affair between my new daughter and me. We'll have all the drama that goes along with it: the dreamy highs of ecstatic, unbinding love, and the challenges of resentment, tantrums, toddlers and teenagers.

Yesterday, I also realized that I'm a lot more relaxed about the whole new kid thing not just because I've done it before but also because I can see the long view a little bit better now. It doesn't matter so much if I have the "good sleeping habits" nailed. And a bout of crying isn't so horrible since, as my sister says, "everything is temporary."

Grace Amelia

2007-11-19T19:04:00.001-05:00

Grace Amelia, originally uploaded by Pilkaroo.

You know when...

2007-11-19T19:00:00.000-05:00

Your daughter is watching too much Go Diego Go when she looks a crocodile and says, "That's a Caiman."

Yep, the daughter's adorable

2007-10-24T12:50:00.000-04:00

Me: Who do you want to read your story? Mommy or Daddy?

Audrey: Daddy

(pauses)

Audrey: Daddy, I want to lay in your arm. [Meaning, when you read me my story, I would like to nestle my head in the crook of your arm]

Yes, she's so frickin' cute I can't take it sometimes.

Pictures

2007-10-19T21:18:00.000-04:00

So I've just uploaded some new photos of Audrey to my Flickr account. It's astonishing the number of photos I took in the first year, compared to her second - about three times more in the first year. In fact, I posted more pictures in her first three months than I did in her entire second year. I was also amazed to discover that I had no photos of her around Christmas time.

If I'm this bad with my first child, I wonder what will happen when the second one comes.

New Favourite Photo

2007-10-18T21:45:00.000-04:00

Daddy and Daughter, originally uploaded by Pilkaroo.

Big Bum

2007-10-17T21:42:00.000-04:00

Today, Audrey said, "I've got a big bum." With me feeling big as a house right now, I'm sure she's heard me utter that phrase once or twice.

Uh oh.

Acupuncture

2007-10-12T19:21:00.000-04:00

I've been suffering from some tingling in my hands and forearms for the past two weeks. It's the worst when I wake up in the mornings after sleeping with my hand tucked underneath my pillow. I'll often get up in the night to do my bidness, so having your hands feel like they're on the verge of falling asleep is very very annoying - to the point of keeping me up for at least a few hours.

I mentioned this to my midwife yesterday. Apparently, the tingling is from an excess amount of fluid in my forearms putting pressure on my carpal tunnels. She suggested that I go see an acupuncturist.

Holy cow, I'm a believer.

I had one session on my hands and feet. When I left there, I could feel that my left foot had significantly improved. But the real test was when I woke up this morning. No pain! Nada. I'm just hoping that it'll last.

Breech Baby?

2007-09-12T08:56:00.000-04:00

Audrey was a Frank breech baby. The details on the timing are fuzzy, but I think at about 28 weeks, my midwife started to notice that Audrey was head up. At about 32 weeks, my midwife sent me for an ultra sound to confirm. There Audrey was, a perfect V, bum straight down and her head up.

I became fixated with not having a c-section. I devoured every article on the subject since I wanted to inform and prepare myself. I also researched every way to try to get her to turn - and I tried almost each and every one of them. From lying down inverted, to burning moxibustion sticks beside my pinky toe, going to the pool, the Webster technique, acupuncture, meditation, and an ECV.

As the weeks passed, I could feel her hard head growing larger on my right side, just under my ribs. She wouldn't budge. I became increasingly alarmed and bummed out by the idea of having a cesarean. And it went on like that for about four or five weeks.

Now, at 29 weeks, I can sometimes feel that familiar hard lump emerging in the exact same spot. Unmistakable. But unlike Audrey, this one shifts and moves, so it's a good sign.

Instant Travel Photographer

2007-09-10T18:20:00.000-04:00

Ok, not exactly a travel photographer. I'm happy to report that one of my Flickr images has been selected for the Memphis Schmap guide.

You can view my work here:
http://www.schmap.com/memphis/shopping_downtown/#p=79970&i=79970_3.jpg

If you don't see my photo of the cash register immediately on the top right, scroll A. Schwab's Dry Goods Store (in the middle column) and the images in the right will cycle through.

Cool, huh?

Audrey Out of Bed

2007-09-09T15:50:00.000-04:00

When we woke up today, Audrey must of heard us talking because before you knew it, we could hear the patter of her feet walking down the hall. She happily swung the door open and announced, "Audrey got out of bed!"

I guess a lot of parents would dread this moment - when your kid discovers that nothing is really penning her in and that she has the choice and ability to get up when the mood strikes her. It means that my "luxurious" 7:00 wake up call my now become 6:00 or - ack - 5:30 am. Or worse yet, that Audrey might get up in the middle of the night thinking that it's time to get up.

But I don't see the downside (yet). To me, it's a sign that my little girl is growing up.

Flying With a Toddler, Part 3: Pick Your Seat

2007-09-08T13:11:00.000-04:00

I couldn't have planned my last flight to Vancouver any better. We went out in late July since it was the only time we could get off before Audrey turned two years old and we'd have to pay for her fare. Here's my next tip in my series of Flying With a Toddler.

Tip 3: Pick Your Seat

There's a whole strategy with picking your seat. If you plan well and are a bit lucky, you'll end up with a spare seat for your under-two-year-old to use without having had to pay for it. Having that spare seat is really handy. Audrey could lie down and have a snooze for a few hours, leaving us free to get up and stretch or eat a little over-priced Mr. Noodles unencumbered.

Strategy #1: Always pre-book, even if you have to pay a little extra.

Strategy #2: Look for planes that have three seats in the middle between the two aisles, or at least three seats in a row. I've purposely crossed flights off of my list if they didn't have a larger plane with this configuration. If you are travelling with another adult, book the two outer seats, leaving the one in the middle free. The chances of a single person booking the middle seat between you and your travel companion are slim if there are other options available. And if in the rare chance it does happen, you could request that the person switch seats so that you and your travelling companion are sitting beside each other. After all, who wants to sit between two parents and their toddler?

Strategy #3: Choose seats towards the back of the plane. The seats toward the front of the plane seem to get booked first, so you'll have better odds at getting an empty seat if you're at the back of the plane.

Strategy #4: If it's not possible to get an empty seat based upon the pre-booking seating plan, request the bulkhead. This way, you'll get more leg room and your little toddler will have a chance to stretch his or her legs without crowding the aisle.

Strategy #5: Ask the flight attendant if you or anyone else can be moved to allow for a free seat. After all, the unlucky passenger who might be sitting beside you would likely prefer to be sitting beside a quiet (or even chatty) adult, rather than a potentially screaming, drooly baby that might potentially spit up on him. This is my least favourite strategy, but one that I've employed so that two young girls could sit somewhere else to allow for my husband to sit beside me and freeing up an empty seat between us. I actually think those girls appreciated it.

Two trips ago, I had the flight from hell, squeezed against the window beside a woman who would not stop talking to me. No leg room, no view. Just me and my overly tired daughter who had been up since 5:30 that morning. I was regretting having switched planes, which had a luxurious amount of open seats and ended up being only 30 minutes later than the flight I ended up with.

Then again, you could always splurge and just buy that extra seat.

View Other Travelling Tips:

Toddler vs. Teen

2007-09-07T21:53:00.000-04:00

I was talking with some co-workers today about the similarities between teens and toddlers. Both are really hormonal and are exploring independance. Audrey frequently challenges my opinion on things and insists on doing things her own way.

I can't blame her really. It must be incredibly frustrating to be a toddler.

Toddlers have no concept of days of the week. So on Saturday, she might get up, have breakfast and watch an episode of her beloved Dora the Explorer. Sunday - the same. But come Monday, she will happily eat her cereal, excitedly set her spoon down, march to the top of the stairs and pronounce "Dora now?" Well, it would be terribly random of me to say no. I can see how it would be unfair.

Same thing for diapers. When we go out on the weekends, we put her in the pull ups that are slightly less absorbant than the regular ones. She prefers the pull ups - I think she finds them more comfortable, and likes the pictures of the Disney "princesses" (yes, she can point out the Little Mermaid). So when we put her in regular diapers before bed time, well, that must seem pretty random too.

Every morning is a battle of wills with changing her out of her PJs. Finally, I ask her in my very serious quiet calm voice to co-operate, and that seems to get her to give in. It's about her asserting her independance.

Someone asked me today if she was going through the terrible twos. I have to honestly say no or at least, not yet. But I wonder if she isn't going through it because I'm just not seeing it that way. It's been incredibly helpful to see the world through her eyes and has given me tremendous patience in some of the most frustrating situations.

I have no idea if it's at all similar with teens or how I'll cope when that comes. I guess I'll just have to find out.

29 Weeks

2007-09-06T20:40:00.000-04:00

29 weeks to go. I'm amazed that I really have only 11 weeks until B-day. I am freaking out about the baby's positioning. Audrey was a breech birth and it was about this time in that pregnancy where the midwives were starting to get concerned about her positioning. I think the baby did a flip flop over the past few days and has moved head down. Yay!

Here's what Baby Center has to say about it:
http://www.babycenter.ca/pregnancy/fetaldevelopment/29weeks/

Potty "Learning"

2007-09-05T11:54:00.000-04:00

Audrey is in the process of learning how to go to the potty. As I write this, I'm struck by how utterly ridiculous it is to blog about the progress of my daughter's number 1s and 2s, but this is a blog about toddlers, newborns and pregnancy and you are reading this.

I'm winging it a bit, but I'm also doing some anecdotal research - asking relatives, friends - as well as reading articles and books. There seems to be lots of general articles about the topic, but not a lot of step-by-step information. It's probably the project manager side of me coming through, but I would really like the whole thing broken out in "phases". You know - Phase 1, introduce the potty, but don't push it. Let your toddler discover it herself. Phase 2...

Anyhoo, nothing so spelled out for me. Likely because all children are different, blah, blah blah.

One interesting change is the introduction of the term "potty learning", instead of "potty training". The thought is that children don't really need to be trained on how to go to the bathroom - that the process of learning how to recognize the urge and developing the muscle control to wait until the right moment to actually go to the bathroom.

I have to admit, I was first offended by the term. It seemed a bit schlocky and PCish and didn't see what the big deal was with the idea of training Audrey on how to use a toilet. (It actually seems that the term "training" is offensive when it comes to anything relating to raising children, but more on that for another post.)

I'm not sure when the term was first introduced. I happen to have a early 90s edition of the venerable Penelope Leach's Your Baby and Child: From Birth to Age Five and she uses the term there. For some reason, when she uses it, the phrase all of a sudden gains credibility for me. I suppose it does make sense that a child will learn how to control their bodily functions at some point and that we are indeed not "training" them to do that - merely showing them that pee actually belongs in a toilet and not in their pants.

I have a love-hate relationship with William Sears, the uber attachment parent guru. I did buy his "infotainment" book You Can Go to the Potty, which educates toddlers about the mechanics of going to the potty, which has been extraordinarily helpful.

Anyway, I've come around to the term, but I still won't use it in public. It just sounds too ridiculous.

Dora Addiction

2007-09-04T07:26:00.000-04:00

Jesse and I don't watch a whole lot of TV so I didn't expect that our kids would either. Not that it makes much difference, but I expected that our kids would mostly watch movies so we could control what they were watching, as well as avoid commercials. I don't have a thing against kids watching TV per se - just in excess.

So to my surprise, I've created a little Dora the Explorer addict. I don't know exactly how it happened since I had no clue who Dora was three years ago. The first time I had heard or seen Dora was when I was pregnant and saw her on TVO while I was recovering from my appendectomy (yes, at 16 weeks pregnant).

Audrey's addiction runs deep. She doesn't just request to watch TV, she specifically asks for "TV Dora". She started just asking for Dora, but when we purposely would respond with a Dora book, she found a way to be more specific. And I've had to deal with many a puddle of tears and tantrums after I've told Audrey that she can't watch Dora before she goes to daycare during the week.

It's not like we give her free reign to watch Dora. Audrey has even picked up on our aversion to letting her watch Dora; when she asks, she now says "TV Dora - a little bit?" or "TV Dora - maybe?" Or, when an episode winds down with the "We did it" song, she makes sure to put in a request for another episode right away - even though the current episode has about 3 minutes left on it.

Audrey's love of Dora isn't limited to the TV show. She also has a good collection of books, two Dora dolls, a Dora the Explorer suitcase shaped like a school bus, a Dora blanket, a Dora sippy cup and plate and bowl set at her Grandparents', a basket shaped like Dora's head, and Dora alphabet flash cards.

I'm not entirely sure how the obsession started, but I can't deny that I'm largely to blame - after all, I'm the one that bought her that Dora sleeper and continue to tell people that Dora-anything would make a good gift.

I suppose the most annoying thing is that Dora (and her eight-year-old cousin Diego) are everywhere. Nick Jr. has really pulled together an unstoppable marketing machine. Today, we were at the drugstore and walked by some greeting cards. Audrey didn't hesitate to point out the Dora birthday card, which was conveniently at her eye-level. Dora stickers are available in her Minigo, as birthday balloons, clothing - whatever you can possibly think of. And I'll admit, I have bought products, specifically because they have Dora on them.

Damn them.

But it's not so bad. I must admit that I like Dora. A co-worker also pointed out to me that Dora made a great role model for girls. I have to agree. Since Audrey is half-Filipino, I like that Dora is the first Hispanic cartoon character, and a girl at that. I like that Audrey is presented with a lot of opportunities to learn shapes, colours and numbers, as well as challenge her memory and problem-solving skills. The fact that Dora also teaches Spanish is an added bonus - to our surprise, Audrey knows how to count to 10 in Spanish with some skill.

So I guess TV and Dora has a place in my daughter's life. And I can't deny - she has become a brilliant child. :)

Chi Mi Na Morbheanna

2007-09-03T09:14:00.000-04:00

A few posts ago, I wrote about Audrey's bed time ritual. Part of it includes listening to music. Not as a crutch to listen to as she went to sleep, but to signal to her that she should be getting ready to go to sleep.

Almost every night, our song of choice is "Chi Mi Na Morbheanna", the first song on The Planet Sleeps. Sung by the Rankin Family (and the only song that I actually know by them), this song is incredibly beautiful, melodic and relaxing - and I had absolutely no idea what the Gaelic lyrics meant, until now:

Mist Covered Mountains

Chorus
Oh, roe, soon shall I see them, oh,
Hee-roe, see them, oh see them.
Oh, roe, soon shall I see them,
the mist covered mountains of home!

There shall I visit the place of my birth.
They'll give me a welcome the warmest on earth.
So loving and kind, full of music and mirth,
the sweet sounding language of home.

Chorus

There shall I gaze on the mountains again.
On the fields, and the hills, and the birds in the glen.
With people of courage beyond human ken!
In the haunts of the deer I will roam.

Chorus

Hail to the mountains with summits of blue!
To the glens with their meadows of sunshine and dew.
To the women and the men ever constant and true,
Ever ready to welcome one home!

Chorus

Here is a Gaelic version of this song:

Chi Mi Na Morbheanna

Chorus
O chi, chi mi na morbheanna
O chi, chi mi na corrbheanna
O chi, chi mi na coireachan
Chi mi na sgoran fo cheo.

Chi mi gun dail an t-aite 's an d'rugadh mi
Cuirear orm failt' 's a' chanain a thuigeas mi
Gheibh mi ann aoidh abus gradh 'n uair ruigeam
Nach reicinn air thunnaichean oir.

Chorus

Chi mi ann coilltean, chi mi ann doireachan
Chi mi ann maghan bana is toraiche
Chi mi na feidh air lar nan coireachan
Falaicht' an trusgan de cheo.

Chorus

Beanntaichean arda is aillidh leacainnean
Sluagh ann an comhnuidh is coire cleachdainnean
'S aotrom mo cheum a' leum g'am faicinn
Is fanaidh mi tacan le deoin.

Chorus

I really love this lullaby album - all international songs. We used to listen to a lullaby CD by Laura Nashman, but the flute was really getting on my nerves. Before that, I had a rolling loop of the ocean. Perfect, except for the synthesizer interludes someone inserted.

Any advice on lullaby albums?

Attachment Parenting

2007-09-02T09:19:00.000-04:00

I could say a lot about the subject of attachment parenting and probably will here and in future posts. I thought I'd list my biases here, clear as day (or not), so you could see what slant all my posts are written with.

I actually think of myself right in the middle and have adopted or considered adopting practices from both sides - although I'm not entirely sure what you'd call the opposite of attachment parenting.

Some things that I've done that are considered to be attachment parenting:

Co-slept with my daughter (although not full time)
Breast fed, and tried damn hard to continue to do so as long as possible, even though I had enough crying bouts about it in the beginning and even though I went back to work part time when Audrey was seven months old.
Breast fed within 30 minutes of her being born. A challenge considering I was having a c-section.
Had her lie on my chest all icky and vernixy soon after she was born - even though I was having a c-section.

Some things that would be considered the exact opposite of attachment parenting:

Fed on a timed but flexible schedule (not on demand). I followed the Baby Whisperer's advice on this one.
Employed the Ferber method of cry-it-out to help her learn how to go to sleep - albeit after months of my other methods not working and only after she was a year old.
Had her sleeping in her crib early on and as much as possible.

As I write this list, I'm struck by how hard it is to come up with the non-attachment things, although the ones on my list seem like definite attachment parent no-nos.

I'll add to this list as time passes....

Johnny Cash Does Kids Songs

2007-09-01T19:24:00.000-04:00

I'm a huge Johnny Cash fan. Ever since we went to Memphis in 2005. Memphis is a great place if you ever want somewhere kind of kooky to visit. Graceland's Jungle Room alone is worth the trip.

Anyway, as I've said, I'm a huge Johnny Cash fan. So when I found out he had a children's album, I was right into it. I don't even mind that the lyrics are so non-PC - that's actually part of the appeal.

Turns out that Audrey is a huge fan too. After each song, she yells, "Again!" and we play "Nasty Dan" or "I Got A Boy And His Name Is John" over and over again.

I'm grateful for her penchant for the Man in Black. It means I'm not tortured by hours of Raffi or Fred Penner and "Baby Beluga" or "Take You Riding in My Car-Car". Or worse - humming them during meetings with my co-workers. It's bad enough that I can't get the Dora the Explorer theme song out of my head.

She also loves Bob Marley. What can I say - the girl has taste.

I'd love to hear more recommendations for kids music.

Flying With a Toddler, Part 2: Board Last

2007-08-31T19:13:00.000-04:00

Audrey should have her own frequent flyer points. She's flown to Vancouver five times and to Calgary once - all before she turned two years old.

We're old hats at it now, but originally, the prospect freaked me out. I dreaded the thought of having an inconsolable baby crying non-stop for 5 hours, the glare of other passengers burning into my back. I couldn't find many tips online, so I turned to friends and family for pointers - most of whom didn't have much to say in this department.

Tip 2: Board Last

Jesse's aunt, however, had one pointer that I still follow: board last, especially if you have someone with you. The airlines always invite families to board first, but if you think about it, it actually makes more sense to board last:

Your kids can have a chance to run around more.
You can walk around freely.
You limit the time that you're in a confined space and on that plane.

And the business flyer in me doesn't want to be on a plane any longer than I need to be.

View Other Travelling Tips:

Swinging!

2007-08-30T08:53:00.001-04:00

Swinging!, originally uploaded by Pilkaroo.

Action shot of my insanely grown-up kid. She's not even two in this photo.

Cloth Diapers?

2007-08-29T14:09:00.000-04:00

I consider myself a moderate environmentalist. I've been converted to not taking a bag at a store if I don't need it and Nelly Furtado has reminded me to turn off the lights every time I leave a room. I still own a car though and drive everyday. And I still take to-go cups at Starbucks even though I have a ton of commuter mugs at home that I could use.

Anyway, with Audrey, I really debated whether or not I should use cloth or disposable diapers. There's the argument of using too much water and energy when cleaning the cloth diapers. On the flip side, there's all of the paper and manufacturing issues with using disposable.

In the end, we decided to go with disposable. Just before Audrey was born, Toronto started the Green Bin Program, so it settled the debate for me. I could put diapers guilt-free into the organics bin and voila - Pampers turns into high-quality compost for farms and parklands.

But now with the second, I'm considering using cloth diapers part-time. Maybe using highly absorbent disposables at night, throwaway Huggies while I'm out, and maybe cloth diapers most of the time when I'm at home. My husband isn't convinced - he thinks it'll be more hassle than it's worth. And thinking about maintaining a diaper pail full of poo and pee slop makes me tend to agree with him.

In any event, on my sister's recommendation, I'm considering purchasing Mother-ease diapers. I like the idea of having diapers with snaps (instead of velcro) and want to avoid the foldable liners. The part-time packages seems like a pretty good deal - it comes with half the recommended amount of diapers, liners and covers. And it's about the cost of 60 days worth of newborn diapers.

I'm pretty convinced, but here are the things that are still on my mind:

What if I hate it and end up with the waste of owning cloth diapers and disposable diapers?
What about those diaper pails?
What about rashes?
What about leaks?

Wouldn't mind hearing what others thought on this one...

Bedtime Rituals

2007-08-28T21:53:00.000-04:00

After two years, our bed time routine is becoming a dream come true.

After bath, we get Audrey's PJs on. Her pink monkey PJs are a definite favourite. She picks two or three stories (one most certainly from her vast Dora the Explorer collection) and we read them. We listen to "Chi Mi Na Morbheanna" by the Rankin Family, the first song on an excellent lullaby CD called The Planet Sleeps. In between, we chat about her day. Today, she was talking about going on the rope ladder on the "big playground" - basically the larger jungle gym at school that she's allowed to play on now that she's two.

Then I say her "special story" Goodnight Moon - which I have now memorized since I've said it almost every day that she's been on this earth.

Finally, after months and months of doing the same ritual, I'm seeing a payoff. She's now come to expect that I'll leave right after her special story. No more crying or pleading when I leave. She even asks matter-of-factly, "Mommy go now?"

I used to be obsessed with Audrey's sleeping habits and dreaded putting her to bed. I was terrified that I'd have a kid who never slept through the night and who begged to come into bed with us. Don't get me wrong. I'm pro co-sleeping, but I didn't want to be doing it until she was in preschool and beyond.

I read both the Baby Whisperer and The No-Cry Sleep Solution. Both of them are very informative in their own way, so I adopted advice from both. I gave her "dream feeds" (feeding her right before I went to bed so she could make it through the night). I put her down drowsy, but awake. I tried not to introduce any "crutches" so that she could learn how to go to sleep on her own.

Did it work? I really don't know. Audrey slept like a typical newborn her first three months, gradually waking less and less. When Audrey was about 14 weeks, I ran into an old workmate who has a daughter that's about six months older than Audrey. I asked how Adelaide's sleeping was going. He scoffed, "She's been sleeping through the night since she was three months old."

How true that was, who knows. Regardless, I was determined to have Audrey sleep through the night. And sure enough, after a few days of employing more tactics from the gurus, she did! I have pleasant memories of sleeping in until 9 in the morning, waking to her babbling to herself in her crib.

And then after three months, to my utter horror, she started waking again, at least once but usually twice a night.

This went on until she was a year old. She was teething, I'm sure, even though only her two bottom teeth showed their gleaming nibs by the time she was 10 months old. And finally, out of desperation, I "ferberized" her.

I was convinced it wouldn't work. Audrey's name means "noble strength", but some days I think it might mean "stubborn". But Jesse and I were at the point where we would try anything - so we vowed to give it a week. After two days, sweet silence.

Since then, Audrey has slept through the night most of the time. She did (and does) have bouts of waking especially when her teeth were coming in or when she's sick. Now at two years old, I would officially pronounce Audrey as a "good sleeper".

But after all that, I don't really know or think it was all of the advice from the gurus. They all - even Ferber - helped a bit in their own way. Truthfully, the one thing that has made Audrey solid is her bed time routine and knowing exactly what to expect and when.

And now, I love putting her to bed. I've found that the greatest reward from this hard work is not because she goes to sleep so easily - it's the time we spend together. It's the one of the only times during the day when it's just her and me. I can picture a future with shopping, cooking fancy meals, mending of broken hearts.

And really, that would be the dream come true.

Daycare Birthday Parties

2007-08-27T20:06:00.000-04:00

Audrey had her "official" second birthday party on Saturday. We had a small family-only party. Ok, not totally family only - one of Jesse's cousins brought a friend from Africa who's going to school in Whitby on a full scholarship. I can now say that I've met someone who's killed a lion and that he's eaten burgers at my house.

I was feeling kind of guilty for not organizing something for Audrey's daycare classmates on Friday. And a little bit guilty for not organizing a kids party - I just have not kept up on my mommy-group socializing to build out my toddler network (maybe this is an idea for LinkedIn?). And I just couldn't get cakes or - God forbid - cupcakes together. So I found myself baking chocolate chip cookies at 10pm last night.

But then today, when I dropped off my offering of back-of-the-Chippits-bag-recipe cookies and birthday hats, one of the care workers asked me if I'd be joining them for snack in the afternoon. Again, guilt.

No balloons. No cupcakes. No cake. And no mommy snapping photos and singing happy birthday.

But what can I say - I'm figuring all the birthday etiquette out. To date, I've still not found an article or book that describes the toddler-party rules. There have been other toddlers, obviously, who have had birthdays at the daycare. Audrey has been on the receiving end of notes advising us of the contents of homemade recipes. And loot bags stuffed with Dora stickers and other dollar store finds. Somewhat related, I heard of a girl who recently "graduated" from the toddler program to go to the preschool program. Her mom wanted to take a class photo and for that, I signed a waiver.

I can't see myself doing any of that. Ever. It's just not in me (although I should never say never). But I still can't help feeling like I should be doing more.

Does that make me a bad mom? Do I need to find the inner Martha Stewart in me and figure out how to sew Halloween costumes and make sugar cookies at Christmas?

God, I hope not.

One on the way

2007-08-26T08:58:00.000-04:00

So, I've decided to take a different angle with this blog. When I started it, I had just left a job that I found extremely demanding and stressful and that made me constantly need to choose between being a mom and wife and succeeding in my career. The multi-tasker side of me thought that I could juggle everything. But in that job, I realized that I needed to refocus my priorities - I wasn't able to be the mom and wife I wanted to be without the quality of my work suffering.

If you had asked me then if it was possible to balance a demanding job and family life, I would have no. At the time, it seemed like an impossibility. And in that situation, it was.

And so I made a really tough decision and decided to leave my job in search of a new one. In retrospect, it was the best thing I ever did. Sure I'm still in the honeymoon period of my new job, but so far, it's proving to fit much better in my life.

Shortly after I started my job, we found out that we were expecting our second baby. It came as a surprise to us and I have to admit I wrestled with how to tell the world. Let's face it: announcing that you're pregnant after being in a new job for only six weeks is far from ideal. I was truly torn. On one hand, I was overjoyed that my little Audrey would have company. On the other, I was dreading telling my co-workers.

Anyway, in the end it all turned out ok - so great, in fact, that there really has been no drama to pen here. Nothing really insightful about being a working mom to log. So I'm changing the theme.

I've found very little resources about how to manage having a second baby. I want to know what strollers to buy and if it makes sense to buy a double when I think Audrey won't be needing a stroller for that much longer. I want to know if how people deal with a baby crying in all hours while trying to make sure that the toddler down the hall stays asleep.

So here I am.

Second Birthday

2007-08-25T17:57:00.001-04:00

We celebrated Audrey's second birthday today. Had a few of Jesse's family members over for a small birthday party. I can hardly believe that my little one has been on this earth for two years.

I've started making a video in iMovie of some of my favourite photos and videos. When I look back at those early days, I can barely recognize her. I mean - I remember her and can see Audrey in the photos. I remember very vividly taking most of the photos. But the transformation is so huge that it seems too abstract to connect the dots between who Audrey is now and who she was in these photos.

As I talk to my friends about their new babies, I realize that I'm forgetting. I never thought I would forget. Living in the moment, it seems unthinkable that so much time would pass that I'd forget. Realizing how much can happen in two years makes me realize how important it is for me to live in the now and to cherish everyday that is today.

Happy Birthday, Audrey. I love you so much.

The Perils of Flying

2007-03-21T13:04:00.000-04:00

So my flight out to Vancouver was utter hell. Arrived at the airport at 6:20 am and arrived in Vancouver 12 hours later. Probably the worst travel experience I've ever had.

Showed up a smidgen too late and ended up missing my flight. The most aggravating part was that I was in line waiting to check in and I missed my cut off. Found out that if I ended up checking in online I would have probably ended up catching it.

Thankfully got on the next flight and was relieved to find out that there was ample room for Audrey and me. Too bad the plane had to get a thingamabob fixed on it which meant that we all needed to deplane. Worst part was that I was walking all over the terminal without my stroller and with the heaviest backpack EVER (have no clue why I packed that laptop).

Begged a flight attendant to let me on the next flight. Unfortunately, my bags would have to follow from the other plane. Got squeezed in the very back beside a overly chatty woman who would not stop talking (at one point Audrey was so tired that she wailed in the woman's face, begging her to shut her yapper so she could have a moment of silence to sleep).

Ended up needing to wait for my bags in Vancouver. The ironic part was that they came only 30 minutes later. If I had just ended up waiting, I would have saved myself a ton of grief.

Patience is definitely not my best asset.

Freaky Flying

2007-03-15T08:02:00.000-04:00

Wondering why I picked the 7:00 am flight to Vancouver.

Flying With a Toddler, Part 1: Pick Your Stroller

2007-03-14T12:52:00.000-04:00

I'm planning on flying to Vancouver with Audrey on Thursday. Audrey's done more flying than my 40-year-old brother has done in his lifetime. I myself am a pretty seasoned flyer. But this is the first time with just Audrey and me. Usually my husband comes with. I'm a little panicked. So I'll post a few tips when travelling with a toddler throughout the next weeks.

Tip 1: Travel with an umbrella stroller

When Audrey was born, our only extravagance was the red Bugaboo Frog. We thought it would be great walking the dog at the beach and around the neighbourhood (and it was and is), but its collapsibility was killing me when travelling, not to mention while storing at daycare. (More about that in a later post.)

So I went out and bought a Maclaren.

I don't regret buying the Frog, but I will say that tooling around town in my new Maclaren Quest is a dream while shopping, and the breakdown a breeze. I'm sure it will be a hit when walking up to the plane. The Frog breaks down in two extra parts. We didn't want to bother with the travel case so we strap the seat to the frame before we board the plan. That's ok for my husband but it will be a big pain in the butt when I'm by myself dealing with a toddler. I also won't need to hassle with reassembling the stroller when leaving. Or be concerned that the wheels will be in Toronto while the seat will be in Vancouver.

More travel tips in the weeks to come...

Climbing

2007-03-13T22:23:00.000-04:00

Older photo and a bit blurry, but I still love it.

Hello World

2007-03-12T21:36:00.000-04:00

So this is my very first post. Don't know exactly what this blog is going to morph into, but I've been wanting to capture not only some of the small yet huge achievements of my 18-month-old daughter, as well as balancing my life as a working mom for a large organization in Toronto.

I've recently left my job at a medium-sized interactive agency. I was only there a year. I didn't want to go; I just felt that I had to. I was working in a director-level role in this very fast-paced, growing company. When I joined, the company's Toronto location was only 8 months old. Ten months later, the office represented 20% of its total sales. Yup, it was nuts.

I went into my job fully thinking that I could keep my priorities straight. The only thing I'd have to do was "manage expectations" upfront about when I would be coming and going. "Set boundaries" of when to call it a night. And it worked for a bit. But as my job got more and more demanding, I found that my work performance was suffering and I was still rushing home just to barely tuck my little girl into bed.

So no one was winning.

Anyway, I decided to leave that place in search of a challenging job that would still let me be a mom. Today, I'm signing on the dotted line for a new role. I'm starting in two weeks. I'm optimistic that this will be the one.