Monday, December 3, 2007

Beginning of a Love Affair

This morning, Jesse went to work after a two-week hiatus to help care for the arrival of our new daughter Grace. I realized yesterday that I have no recollection of when Jesse left me with Audrey to join the "real world", except for one horrific day of her crying non-stop and me calling him to close our store for an hour and come home.

I was a little anxious about it yesterday. I mean, WHERE did these past two weeks go anyway?? I remember the two weeks prior to Grace's arrival: they just dragged and it seemed like I'd be pregnant forever.

But this morning as I stared down at Grace's little face and pursed lips, I realized that it's all going to be ok. In fact, I realized that it would be the beginning of a wonderful life-long love affair between my new daughter and me. We'll have all the drama that goes along with it: the dreamy highs of ecstatic, unbinding love, and the challenges of resentment, tantrums, toddlers and teenagers.

Yesterday, I also realized that I'm a lot more relaxed about the whole new kid thing not just because I've done it before but also because I can see the long view a little bit better now. It doesn't matter so much if I have the "good sleeping habits" nailed. And a bout of crying isn't so horrible since, as my sister says, "everything is temporary."